0021 - I like lemons, but damn

I like lemons, but damn... at the moment I've drunk all the lemonade I can stand. Maybe it's time to start making Limoncello. One of my friends used to sing the HeeHaw theme song a lot... he'd just be walking by my desk and randomly bust out with it... that was when it applied to him and not to me so I always laughed and shook my head. If you don't know the words, here they are:

Doom, despair, and agony on me... deep dark depression, excessive misery... if it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all... doom, despair, and agony on me. (thank you Ron)

I'm not laughing anymore when it suddenly pops into my head. In the past year it feels like we've dealt with nothing problems:

• Mike was in Afghanistan for a year, and I was here worrying about him. Both sides of that story sucked. 'Nuff said.
• We believed people were basically honest, bought a truck, it was a stinky turd, so we hired an awesome attorney, got the money back that we paid for the truck, but lost about $3k in other expenses.
• Mike had gallbladder surgery.
• We have been fighting the IRS for almost a year now. They recently levied our accounts. We're paying two attorneys to fight them. That is not cheap and it is not convenient either.
• We bought another truck, that while basically good, had a nav system that didn't work, had rails in the back that were hidden under a drop-in bedliner (luckily that was okay), and now has a cracked oil pan we're having repaired... possibly under warranty. Probably nothing earth shattering, but it's bad timing.
• Whoever replaced the handlebars on Mike's motorcycle basically cut away so much metal that there was no structural integrity left. And the rough edges were cutting through the control wires. It took 3-4 days of working on it to make it functional... there was stress.
• The guy who changed the tires out on Mike's motorcycle has apparently never heard of LocTite, so by the time he arrived in Austin (about 3-1/2 hours of riding)... his brake caliper wasn't bolted to anything and he had no back brakes. When people try to send my husband to an early grave I get annoyed.
• We bought a hitch that our installer told us wouldn't work with our truck, the manufacturer says it will, we were going to attempt to have that installed by an RV shop this week... except the truck is in the shop... see above.
• We need to have our self-leveling jacks looked at because only one of them stays down and there was hydraulic fluid on the pavement, but we can't tow it in for repairs until we get the hitch put in, and we can't put the hitch in until we have the truck back, and the truck won't be back until the oil pan is replaced... shit really does roll downhill.
• We need to be out of our house by June 1st. Today is May 9th. Ask me how that's going.
• Once we're out we will be living in the 5th wheel... would like to be moving things in now, but the battery that works the slides has pooped out and the RV needs repairs... do the whole House That Jack Built thing with the 5th wheel, the hitch, the truck and so on...
• We need to have a place to put our stuff, that means our building needs to be put up. Called the guy that leveled our land and he gave our number to two people he knows... it's been a week, they have yet to call. Business must be good. My cousin is now on the case. My cousin is wonderful. He IS a concrete angel.
• My mother-in-law is a wonderful person. I haven't been part of the family for long, but I know that I am seriously lucky to have her in my life and I fell in love with her very early on. She was recently diagnosed with a serious illness and it is very upsetting to me... as you may imagine, it's even more upsetting to her children. She is a fighter so we're hoping for the best, but it is not going to be easy on anyone.
• We are planning a farewell party... with everything else that is going on it is the least important thing we're doing, but since we didn't have a wedding reception, and we're moving out of state I want to see friends and family and mark the occasion. In some ways it is very important because it's a much needed break. This is easier said than done, partially because we have no house to host it in. Someone has offered, I need to make sure she knows what she's getting into. ;P
• I tried to be proactive and get our mail situation taken care of... can't get a 911 address until we can come in to the office to apply for it. Can't have mail forwarded to our property because we have no 911 address. Can't rent a PO Box from the local post office until we can come in to the office to apply for it in person. Game. Set. Match. We lose.
• Had to replace my roof. Add $5k to my credit card debt. No one wanted to buy my house so we are renting it out. Yes that is positive, but I would have preferred to sell it and be done and have the cash in-hand. That said, our property management company is wonderful, if you have a house in the Houston are to rent out I highly recommend them.
• There are a couple of things that I'm not mentioning. Trust me, they add to the stress.

It's not all bad, there are good things here and there. As usual, when there are bad times I realize we have the best family and friends in the universe. I love my husband to bits. I have most everything I want in the world. Sometimes it just gets to be a little much... even if someone has it worse (and someone always does), that still doesn't mean things don't get to the ones who seemingly have it good. We just need to catch a break.

0020 - It's complicated

There was a time, not too long ago, when a can opener was just a can opener.

The other day I looked at my grungy, yet still functional electric can opener and decided I wanted to replace it with a newer, sleeker (cleaner) model. It's a couple of decades old and has seen better days - and in some respects I'd like to start with a clean slate when we move into the RV. Thus began my odyssey... and my dilemma.

Nowadays we have choices. Lots and lots of choices. Too many. That's the first problem I'm having.

And, if you buy online there are also differing opinions on which is the best. For every "I love it, it's the best ever" type of review, it seems there are an equal number of "Don't waste your money on this crap" reviews. How do you know which to believe? I mean, I'm only trying to buy a friggin' can opener here! Why does that have to be such a leap of faith???

That's just one thing I'm comparison shopping for... so my problem is much, much bigger than just a can opener. I've already said that I'm a little overwhelmed at the moment... so I wanted one thing to be simple, and it wasn't... That's life in 2012 I guess.

19 - The boat is sinking...

It's starting to sink in that my time here is growing very short. Not my time on Earth, sillies... just my time here in Texas. I was born here. I've lived 36 years of my life here. There was that short time warp in Mississippi that I can't seem to wrap my head around... seemed like forever, but couldn't have been more than a couple of years... you'll have to forgive me - I was a kid, it was a long time ago so shuddup. The majority of my life has centered around the same 10 mile radius. This is where most of my friends are, this is where my parents are, this is my comfort zone.... My traffic-infested comfort zone. I'm really starting to hate it here... too many people.

When I started dating Mike I knew I was in for an adventure. I also knew we were in it for the long haul even before we officially started dating. Somehow I knew he was it for me, he was the one... can't explain it, it just works. So at some point early on, when he flat out told me that he was going to get me out of League City, I knew he wasn't joking. And I was ready for a change, had been for a while. It's taken almost three years to get here, but his prophecy is at long last being fulfilled.

At first we thought we were headed for Austin. Austin is a nice place, or it was until it got to be so crowded. Guess too many people saw the allure of it so the property values soared, the traffic snarled, and to be honest it has become something of a headache to navigate. Then we considered a suburb outside of Dallas, but we weren't terribly excited about it... it was a job opportunity, and the area is nice, but it is still suburban, and we were ready for rural. We decided to expand our horizons a bit and open the door to the possibility of living somewhere outside of Texas (gasp! did such a place exist?). We actually went about it somewhat scientifically... we compared taxes, we evaluated gun laws, we looked at what the terrain had to offer and weighed it against the value of the land. We decided on Tennessee because it was a good fit all the way around, so we did something daring (for me anyway) - we hopped on a plane and went for a visit. Then we fell in love... with the people and the land. By the end of that first trip it already felt like home.

So here we are today. We're downsizing from a 4-bedroom house to a fifth wheel (a nice one). We were going to sell my house, now we're renting it out (still not sure how I feel about that). We were going to make the house available on July 1, now it's June 1. I'm quitting my job so that I can travel with Mike. Then there is the 2-5 year plan to start Nashoba, our wolf refuge - daunting to say the least (but thrilling). I am excited about these changes, but they also make me very nervous. We have a lot to do and some days I wonder if we'll get there or if it's all going to fall apart.

NASA seems to be out of fashion lately. The public doesn't seem to give a crap about it anymore, and morale is low with all the layoffs we've suffered since the shuttle program was decommissioned. I've always been irritated that most people don't understand that NASA is about far more than space. The research that is done here has bettered people's lives in so many ways, and it has absolutely nothing to do with Tang or freeze dried ice cream. That said, I don't love my job. I like the people, there is some prestige in saying I work at NASA (even though I am only a contractor... and a budget analyst at that), but a job is a job is a job and very few can honestly say that they enjoy what they do. Over the past few years, the fun has been sucked out of it... too much red tape, budget issues, manpower shortages and so on. Plus, I'm not quite as professional as I probably 'should' be, because I refuse to conform. Still, with the countdown clock ticking away, and even though my leaving is voluntary... it feels like I  grabbed onto a trapeze, forgot to put on the harness, and just found out that the union went on strike just before they hung my net. I've been training my replacement for the past month, I don't know why it's important to me to leave them in capable hands but it is... I've worked with most of these people for thirteen years so they feel a bit like family. It at least makes me happy that we hired someone I feel is capable, and in my opinion, she's going to do nicely.

Everything seems so complicated. We try to get something accomplished and there's always some hassle. Even the mail is complicated... we are so rural that we have to apply for a 911 address... have never heard of such a thing. Was trying to be proactive and get that taken care of before we move, but we have to apply in person. Kinda sucks because I have to figure out where to have our mail forwarded to. We are trying to get most things sent to us electronically, but there are magazines and other things here and there that can't be helped.  Think we can have things sent to general delivery at the local post office until we get it all sorted out.

So now that most everything else has finally fallen into place, we can start to focus our efforts on the process of relocation. We have a truck that seems reliable... we like it a lot, barring some minor issues here and there. We have a hitch that just needs to be installed and that should happen within the next couple of days. There are some repairs to the fifth wheel that need to be seen to (primarily the hydraulics on the self-leveling jacks). "All" that's left now is packing up the house, putting our building up, and moving in (I can't say 'erecting' without giggling so I mostly don't even try to say 'erecting', hahaha... 'erecting'). I scheduled a mover yesterday, U-Pack... so far, so good... which basically means I like their pitch, but beyond that we'll have to see. The building... that is something I'm not looking forward to... we are most likely going to be putting that up ourselves, and we have to fabricate our own end walls. We had the land cleared, water lines are run, septic is in, and my cousin, Jason, is in the process of pouring the foundation. He does amazing work, so we can't wait to see how everything has come together once he's done.

If I don't look at the big picture for too long I don't get (as) overwhelmed. I try to keep things in perspective, break it down into manageable tasks. Some days it's easier said than done. Last night I was all kinds of pouty. Today I'm good. Don't know what tomorrow brings.

18 - Minor Adjustments to the Good

There are things I've always wanted to do... grow a garden (sort of done that), can vegetables (been too chicken to try), make jerky (terrifying!), etc. It's not going to be easy doing that in a fifth wheel, but we seem to be coming across ideas that we think will work for us. It's exciting to be able to adapt and still accomplish some of our goals!

I think I told you that I stumbled upon fermentation when I was reading an article about the benefits of vitamin K2. Natto, or fermented soybeans, are cited as a good source of K2... but I'll be honest - I'm not too excited about that one. But... I realized that sauerkraut is a fermented food. Yogurt is a fermented food. Cheese is a fermented food. You can even make fermented pickles - and I love pickles. All those things appeal to me and have the same benefits.

I probably also told you that given humidity concerns, and the fact that using the stove costs us in propane, canning in a water bath isn't all that enticing a prospect. It's also limiting because you can only can high acid foods; for anything else you need a pressure canner or you risk botulism. So fermentation resolves that problem because you don't need to boil anything, except if you use chlorinated tap water, and then you need to boil the water for 15 mins to boil the chlorine out.

That said, I purchased a pressure canner today. It's actually a pressure canner / cooker. It has two benefits... I can put leftovers, vegetables, broth, etc. into a mason jar and pressure can it to eat another day, and I no longer have to refrigerate it. I can also cook things quickly and they should taste as if they were in a slow cooker all day long. It saves energy... mine and that of the fifth wheel. It also means I don't have to bring along a slow cooker which saves space and weight.

Speaking of broth... Martha Stewart is on my shit list. Because of her I thought broth was a labor intensive recipe involving 50 or so ingredients. Not so. Broth is ridiculously simple - buy a rotisserie chicken or roast your own. Use the meat for sandwiches, chicken tabbouleh salad - whatever. Save the carcass. Make meals using vegetables. Save the scraps... the root end of the onion that you usually throw out... the ends of the celery stalks, etc. Stick all that in the refrigerator until you've accumulated what you need. Then throw it in a pot, cover it with water and cook it down until the flavor starts to develop. Not only do you control the ingredients to suit your taste, to maintain control of your salt intake, to potentially avoid preservatives, but you get the health benefits from the bone marrow and minerals that leach out from the bones of the chicken. Here is a better article on the subject.

The next awesome thing... I have been wanting an AeroGarden... but since I've had a backyard for the past few years it really didn't make much sense to get one. The other thing that held me back was having to choose from their selection of vegetables and herbs... I don't always like what they offer - but now they have kits that allow you to choose what you grow. I love to grow things, and obviously there will be no yard in our fifth wheel. It will also be difficult to maintain a garden at our homestead since we don't know what our schedule will be. An AeroGarden is the perfect solution. I can grow seven vegetables and/or herbs at a time and we can have fresh food at hand which saves us money and is healthier because there are no pesticides to worry about.

Recently I read this blog about growing a never ending supply of green onions and decided that was also perfect, and it reminded me that you can do the same thing with celery. If we do that, we can grow nine vegetables, and as an added bonus plants will purify the air in our home.

Another thing I would like to do, since refrigerator space will be limited, is figure out how to do something like this.

You can also visit her website, it has a couple more ideas. It's ingenius. If you think about it, at farmer's markets and roadside stands sell fresh fruits and veggies, and they aren't refrigerated. We started sticking things in the fridge to lengthen their shelf life, but I really think it has had the opposite effect. Seems like every time I go to retrieve something it's wilted or no longer crisp, or I forgot it was in there and it started to rot. I wish I could buy the system ready made but so far I haven't been successful in locating anything like it so we're going to try to improvise. Improvisation is something that Mike excels at... I'm not bad at it, but he's usually quicker on the draw.

Another thing you don't have to refrigerate: Eggs. Who knew? When eggs are shipped to the grocery stores en masse, their natural protective coating is washed off. Egg shells are porous, so they spoil because they absorb oxygen and bacteria is able to grow. By coating them in mineral oil, you stop the oxygen from getting in and prolong the shelf life of the egg - no refrigeration necessary. You can tell if an egg is still fresh by immersing it in water and seeing if it floats or sinks - if it floats, toss it, if it sinks - it's good. I've heard that they will last around six months if you use this method.

So this weekend I am undertaking a slew of food-related projects:

• Fermented Pickles
• Fermented Rosemary-Lemon-Sage Pickles (cucumbers and zucchini)
• Cultured Squash
• Sauerkraut
• Pickled Okra
• Beef Jerky
• Kale Chips
• Zucchini Chips
• Canning Pineapple
• Pineapple Juice
• Kimchi
• Garlic Confit
• Ginger-Mint-Lime Soda
• Use my juicer to make a Lemony Apple drink
• Cola - Was going to make this but couldn't find cola nut so I have to order it. I found a cola syrup at a local healthfood store, but the ingredients weren't listed and I'm trying to avoid refined sugar and use either honey, stevia or rapadura - and it claimed to make 16 servings at 450 calories per serving! I'm hoping that a serving is 2 liters but I don't remember seeing it specified.

I figure the best way for me to concentrate on healthy foods is not to dip my toe in, but to jump - and the easiest way to make that happen is by only bringing healthy foods into our new home and making unhealthy foods unavailable, or at least harder to access. Perhaps it sounds a bit extreme, but I am tired of being fat, having no energy and feeling like crap most of the time. I don't know if it's gluten, processed foods, refined sugar or all of the above, but something's gotta give. I know Mike and I are both having digestive issues; mine have existed since college, Mike's are due to his recent gallbladder removal. Hopefully these fermented foods and giving up gluten will help with that, and more natural sugars will reduce our cravings and provide more nutritional benefits than regular sugar or artificial sweeteners.

Last week I started some fermented pickles and green beans. I just sampled the pickles and they're good! Not quite the same as what you buy in the store, but I think they're better. Slightly milder, but flavorful. And so easy. That bodes well for the rest of my projects. :)

16 - Despite how it may appear, the word obsession is all about me

I go through phases. Anyone who knows me can tell you that. Some of them stick, some don't. My fascination with becoming self-reliant hasn't faded... it's been put on hold a couple of times, but even if I'm not actively pursuing it, I still read blogs or search the web for whatever piques my interest. Given our near term living situation, my interests have been somewhat modified from gardening and canning to what I can accomplish inside a 39-ft fifth wheel.

In short, I feel like we as a society have lost valuable skills in this age of computers and instant gratification. Not that instant gratification isn't nice, but there is a price to pay when you become reliant on anything other than yourself and I feel like I have become a very impatient person... I'm ready to slow down. My grandparents knew how to do things that my parents stopped doing, and as a result, I never learned how to do them (they say you always blame your mother - I also blame my dad, hahaha). It's part curiosity, part contingency plan, but I am determined to resurrect some of that knowledge, and I am finding that others have already done the work for me, I just have to collate the material and do the homework.

In that vein I am always looking for articles on how to do things, how to make things - in short, new skills. I am lucky in that Mike is also interested in the same thing, just on a different level. Where I'm all about the food (how to grow it, how to preserve it, how to turn it into something tasty and good for you) and comforts (salt scrubs, essential oils to make natural insect repellents or bath salts or use medicinally), he is more interested in how to create power from wind, water or sun, and more technical things in that vein.

All that is a long segue into how I'm going to start using this knowledge while we're on the road. In a word: fermentation.

Fermentation fascinates me. I am giddy over it. The things I have been reading about its health benefits, how easy it is to do... it blows my mind. I am determined that Mike and I are going to be healthier when I have more time on my hands to actually plan for it and make it happen. I have gone a little crazy with it to be honest. But I think it's a good kind of crazy.

So far this week I have purchased:

Water kefir grains - Water kefir grains are little colonies of beneficial bacteria. There are also milk kefir grains... simple enough distinction - instead of water, you use them with milk... if you want to know more you can look here. When placed in sugar water, much like yeast, water kefir devour the sugar and turn it into something else. In this case, the resulting liquid, or "kefir water," is a probiotic drink. You strain the grains out, add flavorings if you wish, it can even become carbonated and is supposedly still sweet even though the sugar is basically gone. This is something I hope to drink instead of soda. I also hope to make my own (healthier) syrups to create "sodas" using carbonated water I make with my Soda Stream. I'm a realist... I love soda and I can't quit cold turkey (*cough* don't want to), but if I can find a satisfactory replacement, I will gladly switch over.

I love this site, and this lady explains it so much better than I can

Yogurt Culture - There are several different varieties of yogurt cultures available and I chose one that has a milder flavor and cheese-like taste - but more importantly - it cultures at room temperature - no oven required. It's called filmjolk. You take milk, mix it with the starter culture, sit it on the counter for however long the directions recommend (and a little common sense)... voila - you have yogurt. Take a few teaspoons of the yogurt to set aside as culture for your next batch, and as long as you have culture and milk, you have perpetual yogurt that you make yourself so you control what goes into it. And you can use milk from the grocery store, just not the ultra-pasteurized kind.

Cheese - I finally bit the bullet and bought a cheesemaking kit. This particular kit purports to make about 10-30 lobs of 8 different kinds of cheese. I know you can also make soft cheeses with milk and lemon juice as well, but I prefer hard cheeses and like to have options. I have been fascinated and intimidated by cheesemaking for a while now. It probably won't happen much in the 5th wheel, but I can envision making cheese and leaving it to ripen in a climate-controlled bug/rodent-proof section of our building. Soft cheeses could probably be made in the 5th wheel, but with humidity being something of an issue I don't see myself doing a lot of boiling. Which brings me to...

Pickling / Brining. I have been interested in canning too, but with all the steps and the rules and the botulism warnings I haven't dipped my toe into the pond. Did you know that you can make fermented pickles, pickled green beans, pickled okra, sauerkraut and kimchi without vinegar, and without having to can it? All you need is salt, spices, water and time, and magic happens. No boiling required = no humidity issues. I am really eager to get started on that. We love pickles, but in reading about what we are and aren't supposed to eat according to the Blood Type Diet, we aren't supposed to have pickled anything if it's pickled using vinegar. And that made us very sad. This possibility makes us very happy.

I read this and it made a lot of sense to me:

"The synchronicity of traditional cultures pairing fermented foods with heavy protein and fatty dishes is remarkable and speaks to the genius of humans who pay attention. The bacteria and increased enzymatic action of naturally fermented foods helps the human body to digest and assimilate these proteins and fats. In Eastern Europe you find sauerkraut with sausages, in India lamb dishes are often served with yogurt. Chinese pickled cabbage is often found with animal proteins, while in Korea kimchee, a spicy type of sauerkraut, is served with barbeque meats and fried dishes. Japanese fish and meat dishes are usually served with pickled ginger or diakon radish, all of which help the body digest easier."

Also intriguing is kombucha. It's another drink. When I read that it was tea-based I wrote it off. I hate tea. It makes me want to gag. I loathe it. (except for cold chai tea lattes) But then I read another article about the possibility of kombucha tasting like hard cider... and my interest was piqued. I do like hard cider. Kombucha is another one of those fizzy drinks that could potentially replace my soda addiction.

Speaking of hard cider... also printed off a recipe for that. :)

Jerky is another thing I am determined to make this year. I don't like store bought because it's usually got a lot of pepper and I'm not a huge fan of peppercorns, but there's also something off about it... it's rare that anything store bought tastes as good as something homemade, and I also figure it's high in sodium and full of chemicals. Also not sure what kind of meat it is... if it is meat. So I want to try out some recipes and see what works for Mike and I. He's going to be climbing towers, so he needs easy to carry food that doesn't require refrigeration and is nutrient dense. Jerky fits that bill, and despite our blood type... we are carnivores, so we aren't giving that up, maybe we'll just cut back.

I think it's neat that some of these things can be done perpetually (sour cream and buttermilk can be too). If I have milk, I have yogurt, cheese, sour cream and buttermilk. If have kefir grains and kombucha scobies, water/tea and sugar, I have healthy drinks. If I have salt, water and vegetables, I have pickled anything. I can even make fermented salsa. And I don't need electricity to make any of it. Hell, even if the power goes out and I need to refrigerate something to stop the fermentation process, I can make one of these (as long as it isn't humid out...), and I'm set. Also, fermented veggies can be lacto-fermented using whey that I strain off of my cheese... I don't need to buy another starter if I want to do that instead of using salt.

As another self-sufficient move - at some point in the near future we are going to go live with our new enterprise: Volunteer Tactical. Tennessee is "the volunteer state" if you didn't know, thus the name. We're going to have some really neat stuff, so if you're interested in firearms and other tactical goodies, keep checking back.

15 - Still going

The truck issue has finally been resolved. Sure we're still out about $2k, but all in all, getting back (most of) what we actually paid for the truck was a victory. The more we learned about the owners of the dealership, the more dicey things seemed, and I think if I were prone to ulcers I would have definitely been in trouble. It seems that the closer a deadline looms, the more stressful things become for me.

My top teeth are (supposedly) straight now, but my bottom teeth have three more trays to go after this one. Then I get to wear a retainer to bed for... god knows how long. The retainer is slightly more comfortable, but not by much. It sucks to have to keep wearing trays and brushing not only my teeth, but each tray as well. Having the engagers removed was no fun either, it involved the drimmel... my orthodontist sanded them off, and it hurts when the drimmel starts to warm up (literally warm up...). If I had to do it all over again, I would get regular braces. But my teeth do look better... I'm just dreading all the dental work that needs to be done at this point - lots of cavities resulted from these trays.

Mike and I are still preparing for our future. It's stressful to some degree, but the excitement sort of balances it out most of the time. Just so many balls in the air right now... selling the house, packing it up, still need a truck, RV has a couple of repairs needed, still need to find something to store our stuff in and have it built... and all the other stuff we had going on before that. We both get frustrated and then one or the other of us manages to diffuse the tension somehow to keep ourselves sane.

Part of being prepared for the future is to stock up on supplies so that for a few months we won't have to worry about shopping for most of our staples. This is in part due to uncertainty about our income when I'm not working and he starts his new job, and in part due to the fact that we'll be moving around a lot and things may not necessarily be convenient to us. I've been using Amazon Subscribe & Save and Soap.com to buy a lot of gluten-free products because we also want to cut back on our gluten consumption. We both feel like we may have a sensitivity to it and it's part of our goal to become more healthy. There are a lot more gluten free products around these days, but in smaller towns they may not be as widely available, and we can't necessarily have things shipped to us when we're on the road.

I'm loving Soap.com because they have good prices, they accept coupons (you can mail them in for credit), 2-day shipping is free for orders over $39, and you can create a "5 favorites" list of items that you order regularly then you get 10% off of those 5 items each time you order them. If you use WHEEL22809, you get 20% off your order and they donate $30 to Best Friends Animal Shelter. That code is good for all five sites (they have groceries, drugstore items, baby goods, pet supplies and home goods). I've been really impressed... their prices rival Amazon but the shipping is quicker and everything is packed really well. I also like that I can buy a single item, or a package if it's something I know we'll use (rice and beans for example).

And I'm loving the idea of meals in jars... having 'convenience' foods in the pantry that are quick and don't take much thought, but are homemade and healthy. I'm not just talking about brownies in a jar, cocoa in a jar or ranch dressing mix... I'm talking pasta and soup and casseroles like this recipe on Chef Tess' site for Chili. She's got a lot of great looking recipes, but there are others out there that are wise to this method as well. So I want to start playing around with it myself because I think it will come in handy for us.

So that's about it for now. Watching RV... it's funny but now that we're owners ourselves I can see little (exaggerated) nuggets of truth to it. The Long Trailer is a much better movie in my opinion, and probably a lot closer to the truth.

0014 - Coming together

It seems as if things are finally coming together. The truck battle may be... at long last... nearing its end. The dealer has informed our attorney that they intend to refund our money and take the truck back. To be honest, I am not jumping for joy just yet... not until the money is in the bank. These people have not shown much integrity up to this point. They've actually made that same claim before and backpeddled. Of course, this time they said it to our attorney, so if they back out again, they're going to face consequences.

So now, Mike is researching what we want in its stead. In some ways, the engine blowing up was a good thing. The truck we had was an F-350. It was black and it was pimp, so we called it Dolomite... we should have called it Dynamite, since the engine exploded. As far as towing goes, it was adequate; it towed more than we needed, but not by much. Now he is considering F-450's and Dodges. I don't really have a preference, but it seems like there have been issues with Ford engines in general, whereas I haven't heard anything negative about a Dodge.

I just can't wait until we can get a truck, have a hitch put on, and are actually ready to take the fifth wheel on its maiden voyage. I had hoped it would happen prior to our move, and I guess we might still be able to take a short trip ahead of time, but it just didn't work out like we hoped because of the truck.

Something else that moves us forward... I submitted my letter of resignation today. Feels weird. I've been at NASA for thirteen years. When I was hired on, I figured I'd be there for two, tops. I'm not quitting until May, but I need to start training my replacement, and my boss has asked me for an estimated date. It's not that he's pushing me out the door per se, but he has a budget to consider and he's trying to plan. Anyway... I have known this day was coming... but when I held the letter in my hand, it felt really real. It was a little terrifying. Left it on his desk on my way out this afternoon... so it is done.

Most days I have faith that our venture is going to be successful. Some days I worry about the 'what ifs'. What if we do this and we fail? How are we going to raise the capital required to get started? What if no one visits us after we open? What if the community doesn't accept us? It goes on and on.

I can't let myself get mired down in that kind of thinking. Gotta think positively, and ultimately I do believe in what we're doing and I think it will be successful. Just have to work it all out. I know that Mike isn't worried, and he has a way of making things happen. He also has a way of pushing me without realizing that he's doing it... I don't want to let him down, so I don't procrastinate like I might if I was only doing something for myself. It's good for me. He's good for me. Moreover, we're a good team. I'll stop gushing now. (I miss him)

Yesterday I rented a storage unit because I've started to pack up the house, and I need a place for the boxes to go. Haven't started moving the boxes just yet, but I hope to get started on that next week... it's too cluttered in here and I can't stand it. That's more forward motion. Hopefully I'll find a buyer without having to involve a real estate agent... I hate the idea of paying someone 6% of my net... profit margin is going to be slim to none already. And I hope it happens before we move.

This weekend I'm going to a Mardi Gras ball in Louisiana. My friend Kirk is going to be Queen of his krewe this year. He's been working toward that... pretty much since I've known him, and I've known him for almost 20 years. I'm happy for him.

Not so happy for my waistline... he has promised gumbo... brunches... more food... food after that... and then we're gonna eat... my 'diet' starts in earnest when I get back. I'm going to eat better, and at least one day a week I'm going to stick to foods that are beneficial for my blood type. I don't know if there is any merit to the blood type diet or not, but judging by what's on the menu it has to be good for me; it certainly can't hurt me. I need to drop about 50 lbs. No joke. I'm the biggest I've ever been and NOT happy about it. I don't feel good, I don't look good, and my clothes... I refuse to go up a size, so something's gotta give. The one positive thing about my blood type is that we're supposed to do stress relieving exercises like yoga, pilates and tai chi... all of which... I love! Nothing exhausting, no more sore knees. I also need to dig out my Method dvd's and get back to that. I feel better when I am active. Time to get off my butt and get active.

Tonight my goal is to make a list of everything I need to do... I have so much to remember that I have begun to forget things here and there. Not good. If I wanted to be anal about it, I'd put an MS Project together and track it that way - which is tempting... but I think just a list will do for now...